|
WASHINGTON - Once again North Korea is thumbing their noses
at U.S. diplomacy as Pyongyang announced Monday it would immediately
begin construction of 142 new Starbucks franchises, despite
signing a Starbucks Non-Proliferation Treaty in 1994.
North Korean Vice Premier Jo Chang Dok issued a bold statement
declaring "North Korea has the right to enjoy delicious
coffee beverages and enriched uranium just like the rest of
the world. "
President Kim Jong II admits he's intrigued by the American
innovation of providing low paying work opportunities to recent
college graduates with no discernible skills or experience
and feels Starbucks would fit perfectly in the communist nation.
While the basic setup will remain the same as the more than
53,000 U.S.based stores, Chang Dok announced they would customize
a few drinks to appeal to their own distinctive culture.
For example, a Venti Mocha Latte will now be referred to
as the "Large Evil Pimp of Western World," while
the Vanilla Creme Frappacino will be now be known as "Death
to White Devil." The brand new Toffee Nut Latte will
be changed slightly to "Rumsfeld's Shriveled Nuts"
and the Chai Tea will now be known simply as "Bush Swill."
Added Kim Jong, "If Bush thinks we're evil now, wait
till he sees a million Koreans hopped on a Triple Espresso
Macchiato. It ain't pretty."
|
