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Scranton, PA - Lunchlady Mavis McGill's breasts continue to go unnoticed and unappreciated says a 15-year-old high school student who made his stunning discovery over a period of two weeks following winter break.

Beaver High School sophomore Danny Whitehall said that not only was he shocked and awed by the size of McGill's heaving bosom and accompanying cleavage, he was also perplexed as to why none of his classmates had noticed them before.

"When she bends down to ladle the soup, you can see them," Whitehall said. "They're white like porcelain and soft-looking and if you squint a certain way, you can't tell how repulsive and old she really is. It's like magic."

This isn't the first adult school employee Whitehall or his friends had checked out in the past. He admits he sized up [French instructor] Fran Beaulieu within a few days of entering school freshman year and then then noticed [Assistant Principal] Donna Farnsworth had "an ass that could crack walnuts." But both of them are in their early 30's. Mavis McGill turned 57 in December.

"Yeah, I guess so, but she's one of those women you really can't tell how old they are -- like Alice on the 'Brady Bunch,'" Whitehall said. "And who didn't want to have sex with Alice? I sure did."

Whitehall prides himself on being able to evoke sexual fantasies under the most difficult of circumstances - something he has found to be a necessary skill while his teen hormones rage uncontrollably and his fresh thatch of public hair grows in.

"Look, I realize the hot girls aren't gonna want to have sex with some virgin and I've already exhausted the supply of relatively good-looking married teachers, who pretty much ignore me," Whitehall said. "But the lunchlady has never ever been married and I'm pretty sure she'll agree to have sex with me when I eventually hint at it in the food line. Starting tomorrow, I'm ordering the meatballs. Hopefully she'll catch on."

Whitehall has been trying without much success to spread the word about McGill's fantastic rack, but instead had been ridiculed and alienated by the entire sophomore class.

"Fine. More for me. See if I care."

 

Above: Lunch ladies are reportedly hornier than regular teachers.


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