|
New York -- The U.S. dollar fell sharply against
Camel Cash for the third straight week after it was announced
the U.S. trade deficit swelled to more than $60 billion last
month.
"Camel Cash should never be used in place of legal U.S.
currency," Treasury Secretary John Snow said at a press
conference Tuesday. "Camel Cash is novelty money and
can only be redeemed for zippo lighters, baseball caps, and
particularly desperate crack whores."
According to sources in the Commerce Department, Americans
looking for alternatives to to the falling dollar have found
more and more people are willing to accept money printed on
the back of Camel Brand cigarettes© in lieu of real money.
"It's great, especially when traveling abroad,"
American businessman Chuck Albee said."With the falling
dollar, it costs more than $50 for 15 minutes with an underage
Asian prostitute, but for $50 in Camel Cash I get twins for
a full hour, plus a complimentary fleece jacket with Joe Camel's
picture on the back. I couldn't be happier."
White House spokesman Scott McClellan said President Bush
was not very concerned about the current popularity of Camel
Cash, pointing out that all the President had to show for
his collection of Marlboro Bucks was black lung and a free
gym bag.
While Camel Cash has also gained ground against the Euro,
the Japanese yen and the British pound, it is being used almost
exclusively in newly developing Iraq and Afghanistan, where
Americans are using Camel Cash to help pay for expenses as
well as salaries of foreign workers and security staff.
"I'm just 25, 000 Camel Dollars away from a framed poster
of [Nascar driver] Robby Gordon," newly trained Iraqi
national guardsman Ahman El-Sahbi said. "I don't know
who Robby Gordon is but it will look great on the wall of
the home I hope to own someday. I love American capitalism!"
|
|
Above:
Against Camel Cash, the dollar weakened to trade at $1.3039--
or two for zippo lighters.
SEND THIS ARTICLE TO A FRIEND!
|
|
