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"Bob From Accounting
is vulgar and disgusting and not even remotely funny. I hope you
all die of cancer."
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—Anonymous
Fan
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BOB VOWS REVENGE AGAINST COWORKERS. THREATENS TO OPEN CAN OF WHOOP-ASS Reprinted from Bob's private journal (February 10, 2002) Dear Journal, Thank God I have my journal to tell my most secret thoughts and desires. Here's secret thought #1: I'm not joking around this time about getting back at Phil from collections and those cult members for sealing me in that Y2K shelter for the past two years. I keep asking myself what Tony Danza would do in this situation. Being a talented actor and former boxer who doesn't take any guff, I don't think he'd let people walk all over him. And neither should I. Phil is going to wish he never met me after I'm done with him. I'm thinking about opening one of those cans of whoop-ass on his...ass. Okay, that really didn't sound right. Secret thought #2: as far as those bastard website editors that keep harassing me, you'll be happy to know, I've given them the slip. I'm now typing my journal entries on the hidden E-drive of my computer. Those A-holes will never post my personal thoughts again. READ MORE OF BOB'S JOURNAL! Update 2/18/02 Who
is Bob from Accounting?
From 1/25/02 BOB USES PROFANITY AGAINST WEBSITE EDITORS, CONSIDERS HIRING LAWYER COUSIN Reprinted by permission (sort of) Dear Bastard Editors, Hi. It's me, Bob (from accounting). I'm writing this letter because you put my private journal on the internet without my permission after I explicitly told you not to. Also, someone from your staff snuck into my apartment last night and took pictures of me when I was sleeping. When I woke up in the morning I was covered in peanut butter and fire ants. That was so funny I forgot to laugh. If you try that crap again I'm going to call my cousin who happens to be a lawyer. What do you have to say to that, punk-asses? Bob (from Accounting) P.S. Yes, I did get the t-shirt you sent. Thank you.
From 1/19/02 BOB ANGERED BY WEBSITE: 'YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO GET ME FIRED. PLEASE STOP IT'
Hello. I'm Bob (from accounting). The editors of this website asked me to write something funny here but I'm not really very funny. In fact, I can't recall the last time I made someone laugh on purpose. I'm not even sure what the heck I'm doing here. They told me it would would be therapeutic if I let strangers read my journal — which I'm NOT going to do. They also promised me a t-shirt, which I still haven't received. My life isn't funny. And I really take offense to people who think it is. I don't even have an internet connection, except for at work. You guys are going to get me fired. So could you please stop it now. And I want my pictures back. Thank you. From 12/25/01 BOB FROM ACCOUNTING UNEARTHED!!
In what has been described as a true holiday miracle, Bob From Accounting was discovered alive Saturday in an underground Y2K shelter he's been sealed inside since New Year's Eve, 1999. With his food supply dwindling and severe boredom setting in, the confused accountant was prepared to face battle with what he referred to as “the race of ape-like men who now habitate the Earth.” (read article)
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FEATURES
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Showbiz Video Head Cleaner Released on DVD to Poor Reviews, Low Sales
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| © Copyright 2002 Bob From Accounting & Orange Planet Entertainment - All rights reserved. So don't steal -- that means you too, Mr. Steven Spielberg. |