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JERUSALEM - U.S. envoy Anthony Zinni arbitrated a marathon
meeting Sunday between Israeli and Palestinian security ministers
seeking to finally establish a cease-fire after nearly two
years of violence and bloodshed.
After more than 17 hours of talks, the only real consensus
officials were able to reach was that lunch, served around
2 P.M., was delicious.
“A cease-fire cannot even begin to enter our discussions
until the Israeli aggressors leave Ramallah for good,”
argued Palestinian Security Chief Jibril Rajou in between
bites of his fresh fruit salad. “Now, can someone please
pass the blintzes? They are just exquisite.”
Israeli officials insisted a withdrawal would only be possible
if the Palestinians began arresting militants suspected of
attacking Israelis. They also agreed the blintzes were good,
but not nearly as good as the lightly seared tuna with capers.
The Israeli-Palestinian conflict has flared up to unprecedented
levels of violence in recent weeks. With no end in sight,
the leaders were determined to stay at the bargaining table
until an agreement had been reached. The bargaining table
in this case also featured a buffet style luncheon featuring
seafood, eggs, finger sandwiches and pastries.
At one moment, the tense mood was broken when one of Sharon's
aides offered the Palestinian security minister a piece of
gefilte fish covered in horseradish sauce. Both sides laughed
like children when the Palestinian gagged and spit the strange
food back onto his plate.
“I'm not sure if anything substantial was accomplished
today,” admitted Zinni as he loosened his belt. “Israelis
obviously want to prevent terrorism and the Palestinians want
an unconditional withdraw from the West Bank. But I think
everyone is in agreement in the assessment of the luncheon.
When those blintzes were dipped into the sour cream, it was
like biting into heaven.”
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