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GAZA STRIP - A parade of tens of thousands of Palestinians
chanting for the death of Israel and marching as a show of
support for slain Hamas leader Sheik Ahmed Yassin, was suddenly
interrupted by what appeared to be an outbreak of fun early
Wednesday.
According to reporters in the area, the event, which started
with familiar screams of "jihad" and "death
to the Jews," somehow turned into a sort of bloodthirsty
version of Woodstock with songs, games and even a wheel of
torture.
"My favorite part was the falafel-eating contest or
when we competed over who could stuff the most explosives
in our pants," said martyr-in-training Abi Abuda. "I
came in second place but only because the winner cheated and
cut off his own testicles to make more room."
The party seemed to really get going when 21-year old militant
Achmed Al-Salam jumped on a truck during
the funeral procession, grabbed a megaphone and sang "Twist
and Shout." Then everyone started singing.
"I don't know, I guess I was kind of bored and started
a balloon fight, then it just grew from there,"
said Al-Salam, who remains modest about his status as the
Ferris Bueller of the Palestinian Territories.
"We still hate the Jews but that doesn't
mean we can't party like it's 1999," said Abi Mahlahi
who was selling French beer from the back of his truck.
Several attendees noted it wasn't all fun and games, especially
as dozens of revelers suddenly became sick. After it was clear
what was causing the problem, one Hamas leader grabbed the
mic and gave a stern warning to the crowd.
"Don't eat the brown rice. Please, For Allah's sake,
don't eat the brown rice. But, hey, it's your trip, man."
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