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HAVANA —Former U. S. President Jimmy Carter said
a heartfelt good-bye to his Cuban hosts after 2 weeks of forging
new diplomatic ties, spreading American ideals of democracy
and human rights and contracting a venereal disease.
Carter, who became first American president to visit Cuba
since the 1959 communist revolution, became infected with
a particularly virulent strain of gonorrhea during his first
of many nights at the state-run Havana bathhouse, according
to sources.
"Jimmy was berry berry nice to me," said Marguerita
Gonzalez, a 17-year-old prostitute and mother of 6. "He
no tell me he was President, he tell me he not need condom.
It his own fault."
Secret service agents were very careful to warn the former
President and practicing Baptist not to cave in to peer pressure
by 75 year old dictator Fidel Castro, but according to hotel
staff, the two stayed up until early in the morning, drinking,
smoking cigars, and befriending underaged whores.
According to doctor reports, Carter noticed symptoms within
days after the initial exposure to the disease, including
testicular itching, redness and a painful discharge during
urination. Penicillin treatment began immediately after diagnosis.
Fidel Castro, who was briefed on the American President's
condition, brushed off the criticism of the late night parties
and rumors of "wife-swapping."
"Jimmy Carter is a wonderful diplomat and leader and
the American people should be proud," Castro said during
a statewide television broadcast. "But he really should
have worn a condom. Seriously, that's just not smart."
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