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WASHINGTON - President Bush announced Wednesday a
major reorganization of government offices in an effort to
consolidate bureaucracies and be better prepared for fighting
international terrorism in the months and years ahead.
To show he means business, Bush made the controversial decision
to first combine the Right Wing Conspiracy Office with the
much more liberally-inclined Jewish Conspiracy Office, headed
by former vice presidential candidate and Connecticut Senator
Joseph Lieberman.
"I realize these kinds of shifts take a great deal of
adjustment," Bush said during a press conference near
the rose garden. "But those Jews had like most of the
really great office space and it was time to finally unite."
Right Wing Conspiracy officer John Ashcroft was at first
angered to learn the news of the "merger" but now
realizes it is a great challenge for all the conspirators
to begin to work together harmoniously while they secretly
undermine the government and eventually take over the world.
"This is a great day for Jews and also right wing bigots,"
agreed Lieberman. "If we can just stop the bickering
and put our greedy, power-hungry minds together for once,
we can really do some damage.
According to Hilary Clinton, the admission of a Right Wing
Conspiracy Office was no surprise to her but she's pleased
that smaller office space means they're "not quite as
vast."
Until new elections can be held, the new office will be co-chaired
by Pat Buchanan, who will represent the interest of the right
wingers and Former President Bill Clinton will continue to
represent Jewish interests.
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