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The great Marlon Brando has died, I must confide
Though to many tis not a great surprise
At 80 years old, his ticker could no longer hold
three martinis and a bucket of curly fries
The coroner was really quite startled
Me heard the bloke say on the telly
The medical exam, showed a heart made of ham
He bled vodka and cold vermicelli
In Tahiti, he spent most of his life
For that, Marlon was so glad
Didn't need a Mercedes, to get all the ladies
They just wanted to shag Superman's Dad!
Brando was a legend unmatched on the silver screen
A legacy to thousands impacting
T'was the method approach, The Actor's Studio would coach
But I call it bloody overacting!
(short instrumental break and dance number)
Brando was always fond of the lasses
Who loved him despite all his money
But it was his young maid, who he consistency laid
When she managed to find his giant dust bunny!
His children were plagued with drug problems
Son Christian did whatever he pleased
Dad would visit the jail and offer to pay bail
in exchange for prison macaroni and cheese
Brando once played old Don Corleone
And before that in a Streetcar Named Desire
He once did a sketch, as a randy old letch
That's when people said, 'Marlon, please retire!'
When they found him that fateful morning
The bloke's face covered with grape jelly
It was a sad, mournful day, when they carried him away
On one cart his ego, on another his belly
Brando is no longer with us
No more Oscars for the old fella
But in heaven above, he's getting plenty of love
If you listen, you can hear him scream, 'Stella!'
Fare thee well, Marlon. You will be missed.
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TO JOHNNY CASH
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