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Peoria, IL — Ken Shlotky doesn't care what his
friends say about his musical aspirations. Or that his family
members sometimes chuckle behind his back. Or that the music
teacher he's had since fourth grade refuses to acknowledge
his existence.
"My dream is simply that I will write and perform meaningful
music and get paid for it," Shlotky insists. "It's
not about getting some kind of revenge on all the people who
laughed at me or heckled me when I performed at high school
dances. I know my parents never meant any harm by that."
Shlotky, who works part-time in the lighting department at
Home Depot, says he is just biding his time and saving money
while he writes songs about subjects important to him -- like
how his parents are totally unsupportive, or how his brother
is mean and sadistic, or how his former girlfriend is going
to be "so totally sorry she dumped [me] for some ivy
league insurance salesman with a sailboat."
"I think my fame will be most obvious after my second
album -- when critics as well as my parents and siblings will
say things like 'wow, he's not just a flash in the pan.' Or,
'he's no Billy Ray Cyrus.' I can't wait to hear those glorious
words."
Shlotky is particularly proud of a brand new song he penned,
"I'm not a loser", where he uses obscure metaphors
to lament "...the heavy responsibility of being famous
while everyone else is stuck in pitiful, conventional lives
where they don't get to have sex with supermodels or drive
foreign sportscars." "Even though it's fictional,
I think many people will be able to identify with some of
the more universal themes."
Ken's parents, Doris and Jack Shlotky, insist they have been
nothing but supportive of their son's aspirations from the
beginning. "I never once said he was a loser," Doris
argues. "I said he was a failure...which is totally
different."
I'm sure that someday all of Kenny's dreams will come true,"
Jack Shlotky says. "Especially if he finally comes to
his senses and changes all of his dreams."
Ken's younger brother Barry feels differently. "Nope,
he's a loser."
Shlotky describes his music as a cross between Bruce Springsteen
and Bob Dylan, though others argue it's closer to that of
Jewel or Celine Dion.
"I'm not sure how to describe the music except to say
it's definitely gay," older brother Tim says. "Then
again, none of us really listen to it or attend any of the
'mini-concerts' he puts on in the basement for his stuffed
animals."
Ken says he has managed to ignore all the naysayers and pessimists
and maintain a positive attitude, pointing out a recent concert
at a community college's back to school fair, where Shlotky
performed to a nearly sold out crowd.
"It was a book fair!" Tim Shlotky shot back. "Of
course it was sold out. They needed books."
Shlotky's self-produced debut album "Shlotky's Revenge,"
is not expected in stores soon.
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