Date: Wed, 16 Oct 2002 14:45:37 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock@yahoo.com> | Subject: dude ranch To: wfireranch@xxxx.com

Hi there. I'd like to bring my wife and my in-laws out to Wyoming to your ranch. How rustic are the accommodations? My in-laws are in their seventies. Their pretty tough, but they're going to need running water and electricity. Also, are there rodeos at your establishment? I've always wanted to see one. What is the best way to get to your ranch? Which airport would be best to fly in to? Hope to hear from you soon,

Mike (That's me, Shizzy!)

Dear Mike,

Thank you for your email and interest in the WF Ranch. Our ranch has a wonderful rustic charm, but with conveniences and creature comforts. We have hot and cold running water, showers, electricity, the cabins are beautifully furnished and also have new, comfortable mattresses. Our cabins were built in the early 20's and still retain their history but have been tastefully restored.

Three meals a day are served in our main dining room. There is horseback riding, fishing, swimming in our heated pool, a hot tub, lots of activities and games, and western entertainment. There are sometimes rodeos in Dubois, but they are not regularly scheduled so it is kind of hit or miss. There will most likely be one the 4th of July, so that might be a good week to come. We do have our own weekly gymkhana (games on horseback) and everyone that wants to may participate.
The closest airports are Riverton Wyoming (70 miles) and Jackson Hole Wyoming (85 miles). Most guests rent a car, or we can pick up guests for a fee.

Please let me know your address if you would like me to mail you our brochure. thanks and I look forward to hearing from you.

Sarah and John Armistead
WF Ranch

Date: Thu, 17 Oct 2002 07:14:47 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock@yahoo.com> |Subject: Re: dude ranch To: "WF Ranch" <wfireranch@xxxx.com>

That sounds great! I saw a movie a couple of weeks ago called A River Runs Through It. It was a great movie about fly-fishing starring Brad Pitt and Tom Skeritt. I'd really like to try fly-fish while I'm out there. Is there anyone who could teach us how? I want to give my in-laws the full treatment. They were born and raised on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. I don't think they've even seen a horse in real life. This is going to be a major culture shock for them. My main concern is showing them a good time. I really want to impress them. Are there any good restaurants at the ranch? Do we need to buy anything clothing wise that we should buy before the trip? My father-in-law has plates in his head from an injury sustained during a mortar attack while fighting in the Pacific during WWII. He might need a helmet if he's to ride horses. Do you have riding helmets for sale? We'd like to visit on the third weekend in June. I thank you for answering my inquiries.

Hope to hear from you soon,

Mike

From: "WF Ranch" <wfireranch@xxxx.com> To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: dude ranch Date: Thu, 17 Oct 2002 13:24:33 -0600

Dear Mike,

Yes, we have an angler who works from the ranch, and he can give fly-fishing lessons and guided fishing trips.
We have one main dining room on the ranch where three meals a day are served. The food is very good and our cooks are terrific, as well as being friendly and personable.

The only special clothing you may need is blue jeans and cowboy boots. Cowboy hats are also nice, and we do have riding helmets available. We currently have availability in June. We have a one-week minimum stay, and guest weeks run from Sunday to Sunday. Please take a look at our website if you would like, which gives a good description of the ranch. If you would like a brochure let me know where to mail it and I will send one out to you right away.

Thanks!
Sarah and John Armistead
WF Ranch

Date: Thu, 17 Oct 2002 12:48:18 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock@yahoo.com> |Subject: Re: dude ranch To: "WF Ranch" <wfireranch@xxxx.com>

Thank you, that answered most of my questions. I would like to hold off on the brochure for a couple of weeks because I want to keep this a secret from my wife for now. I grew up in Detroit, but I used to spend my summers in Denver. My new wife and her parents seem to think that means that I'm an old cowhand. They see me as some weekend warrior Davy Crockett type. I have to admit I haven't done much to change their perception. As of now they believe that I can ride horses, shoot a gun, hog-tie, and fly fish. I of course can do none of these things. I want to bring them to your ranch in June, but if possible I'd like to visit your ranch by myself for three days the month before. I want to dedicate my first visit to learning how to ride a horse, shoot a gun, etc. so when I return in a month with the family, I won't look like the fool that I really am. So, I'm basically asking if there is someone that would be willing to teach me to do these things. Money is no object. I will pay any amount that the trainer feels adequate for this cowboy training. I know this is an odd request, but I promise I would make in worth while for someone willing to teach me. Also, my father in law wanted me to ask if there are any monkeys in Wyoming. He loves to watch the monkeys on the Discovery Channel and he wanted to know if there were any out west. Again, great site. I thank you for the time you're taking to answer me.

Hope to hear from you soon,

Mike

From: "WF Ranch" <wfireranch@xxxx.com> To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: dude ranch Date: Fri, 18 Oct 2002 08:57:55 -0600

Dear Mike,

If you can decide on what dates you would like to come to the ranch and let us know, I will see what can be worked out. It really is probably not necessary, we have novice riders here every week, and guests seem to get into the ranch routine very quickly with few problems. Sorry to report that monkeys are not native to Wyoming. We have a variety of wildlife in the valley. You may happen to see deer, elk, moose, occasionally even bear. We have bald eagles, sand hill cranes, whistle pigs, etc. We will try and manage your request to come before the rest of your family.
Let me know.

Thanks,

Sarah Harrell
WF Ranch

Date: Fri, 18 Oct 2002 11:43:17 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock@yahoo.com> |Subject: Re: dude ranch To: "WF Ranch" <wfireranch@xxxx.com>

Hi Sarah. Thank you so much for doing this. I would like to visit your ranch May 25 through the 29th for my cowboy lessons. I understand that it would be relatively easy to get the hang of these things after a first visit, but I've really painted myself into a corner. I've told them that I'm really good at fly fishing, horse riding, hogtie, etc. I just need it to appear to them that I've at least done them once before. Also, we would like to go ahead and plan on renting a couple of cabins for the third week in June. Wednesday through Sunday. My in-laws are going to celebrate their fortieth wedding anniversary while we are at the ranch. I'd like to do something special for them after dinner. Are fireworks legal in Wyoming? I'd like to do a high concept firework spectacular for them firing of many at once in all directions. I worked in pyrotechnics for many years so I'm somewhat of a professional. I could entertain everyone at the ranch with a fireworks bonanza! That old western sky as a backdrop to those explosions of color would be magical. I can't tell you how much I appreciate your taking the time to answer my questions via email. I lost my voice two weeks ago and it's really slow to return. College Football is hard on my voice. Lots of yelling...Roll Tide!!! Thanks again.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Mike

From: "WF Ranch" <wfireranch@xxxx.com> |To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: dude ranch Date: Sun, 20 Oct 2002 20:25:19 -0600

Dear Mike,

We will try and help you with your request to learn some western skills, but please know that horseback riding is a lifetime study that really can't be mastered in just a few days. We teach novice people how to ride each week, but there are limits to how much can be learned in a short time, and to really become a "horseman" - it takes years. If you wish to come in May, it looks like we can make that a possibility for you, but since we are not open at that time we will just kind of see how things look in early May (weather, staff, etc) and talk about it then if that's ok with you. As for booking space in June, that would be just fine. However, it is a minimum stay of Sunday to Sunday. In order to hold the space we require a deposit of 30% of guest charges. The rate is $1190 per person/per week plus tax and gratuity, so the deposit amount needed to confirm the reservation is $1428.00. We prefer your check to be received within 2 weeks, or you may call with a MasterCard or visa. The third week in June is June 15 - 22, is this the week you want? You may let me know and I will put you in the reservation book. Also, please let me know your wife and in-law's names, mailing addresses and telephone numbers.
Fireworks are legal in Wyoming and can be purchased in this state. However, I'm sorry, we do not allow fireworks on the WF Ranch. They don't mix well with livestock. Let me know what other questions you may have.

Thanks,
Sarah and John Armistead
WF Ranch

Date: Sun, 20 Oct 2002 23:13:40 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock@yahoo.com> |Subject: Re: dude ranch To: "WF Ranch" <wfireranch@xxxx.com>

Thank you so much. I'm glad to hear that you will be able to accommodate my crash course in cowboy training. That's a shame about the fireworks, but I imagine that they could be catalyst for a stampede. I was talking with my father in law last night about the Back to the Future trilogy and the topic of Indians came up. I must have been pretty drunk, because I told him that there were still wild Indians out west and that I'd killed more than a few in my time. So now my father in law thinks that I am an Indian hunter. I do it to myself, I know, but don't worry I have a great idea. I'd like to hire a couple of local teenagers to dress up like Indians and pretend to invade my in-laws cabin. I'd come out of the darkness on horseback with a gun that fires blanks, screaming "remember the Alamo" at the top of my lungs. After firing off a couple of shots, the "Indians" would ride away in fear. I'd call them "yella" and run to make sure the oldsters were okay. Then the Indians would return on foot and we'd pretend to fight to the death in a well-choreographed battle. We can practice the fight scene while I'm being tutored at cowboy school in May. What do you think? I would be a hero!

Hope to hear from you!

Mike

HELLO? HELLO??? DAMN RANCHERS!

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