Date: Tue, 15 Oct 2002 12:29:03 -0700 (PDT) From: "Frank Shizworth" <xxxxshizzy@msn.com> |Subject: Dream Analysis To: xxxx@rory.com

Hi there,

I'm a student at UCLA studying psychology. I'm writing a paper on the collective unconscious and how it has given rise to different religious practices and beliefs. A large section of the paper will deal with Paganism. I had no idea there was a Pagan analyst out there! I'd like to ask you some questions about Paganism and psychoanalysis. It is really interesting stuff. If you are up for helping a lowly student please contact me. Hope to hear from you soon.

Frank Shizworth (it's me, Shizzy)

From: "John Rory" <xxxx@rory.com> |To: "Frank Shizworth" <xxxxshizzy@msn.com> Subject: Re: Dream Analysis Date: Wed, 16 Oct 2002 13:07:35 -0700

I'm busy & hard to get ahold of, but we could talk on the phone, or chat over coffee (assuming you're willing to drive to San Francisco). I'm easiest to reach at my day job (xxx) 325-xxxx or by pager (xxx) 325-xxxx.

John

Date: Wed, 16 Oct 2002 14:41:11 -0700 (PDT) From: "Frank Shizworth" <xxxxshizzy@msn.com> Subject: Re: Dream Analysis To: "John Rory" <xxxx@rory.com>

Look, man, let me level with you. I don't want to do this paper. It's only five double spaced pages long, but I got shits to do. I earn money running a book here on campus. Would there be any way you could write this paper for me? I know that you could write a good paper in about a half-hour. You don't have to do any citations or any of that stuff. Just an overview of the unconscious and it's role in religious beliefs/rituals. I am willing to pay you up to five hundred dollars. I could even be talked into a thousand. Get back at me if you're interested.

Frank

From: "Rory" <xxxx@rory.com> To: "Frank Shizworth" <xxxxshizzy@msn.com> Subject: Re: Dream Analysis Date: Sat, 19 Oct 2002 20:30:40 -0700

Sorry, amigo, but you'll have to write the paper yourself.

Bright blessings,

John

Date: Sat, 19 Oct 2002 23:09:31 -0700 (PDT) From: "Frank Shizworth" <xxxxshizzy@msn.com> Subject: Re: Dream Analysis To: "Rory" <xxxx@rory.com>

John, dude, don't be a zero. I am talking about paying you a grand to write a paper. This is something that would take you a half-hour to do. You ever make a grand for thirty minutes of your time? I am totally serious about this. I'm not jerking you off here man, but you are an insightful dude. Just write the paper and send it as a word document to my email address. I'll then overnight Fedex a check to your home address. 5 pages, double-spaced, thanks dude.

Frank

From: "John Rory" <xxxx@rory.com> To: "Frank Shizworth" <xxxxshizzy@msn.com> Subject: Re: Dream Analysis Date: Tue, 22 Oct 2002 14:59:30 -0700

OK. Give me the exact assignment, style (APA, MLA or other) requirements, and due date. We'll talk from there. But I don't write on assignment and then wait for payment. Financing works like this:

1) A $100 deposit gets you an outline. Use PayPal. It's fast, and if I don't deliver, you can get your $$$ back from them & they take me to court.

2) I deliver a page at a time for $150/page, up front (again, use PayPal)

3) Once you have all five pages, the final $150 is due. With email & PayPal, this can have very fast turn around. If you're not registered with PayPal, visit their site & register (www.PayPal.com). It's free. $0.80 a word isn't a particularly high price for a quality article for publication. I've gotten paid as much as $1.25/word in the past. Since I don't know you & we don't have an established business relationship, I won't just deliver the article and wait around for payment. I've been stiffed by magazines before ... and I don't know enough about you to grant you $1000 credit for my labor.

Cheers,

John

Holy shit! I insult the guy and now he wants to play ball! What a nipple!

Date: Tue, 22 Oct 2002 17:40:41 -0700 (PDT) From: "Frank Shizworth" <xxxxshizzy@msn.com> Subject: Re: Dream Analysis To: "John Rory" <xxxx@rory.com>

Nice. Now we're talking. Paypal is fine with me. I agree to all of the terms as you state them. The paper is supposed to be five pages double-spaced. The goal of the paper is to simply reference how the unconscious mind has given rise to the belief system and ritual practices in Paganism and other religions. The unconscious framework can be from Freudian or Jungian theory. I usually write about Freudian, but Jungian might lend itself better to this paper topic. There should be an emphasis on symbolism in dreams and how these symbols find themselves projected/included into a religious belief system. No big deal really, I'm just really busy with my book and I'd like an A on this one. Tell me how this sounds. Is this a workable topic for you? Can you make it look good? I really appreciate this John.

Thanks,

Frank

From: "Rory" <xxxx@rory.com> To: "Frank Shizworth" <xxxxshizzy@msn.com> Subject: Re: Dream Analysis Date: Sun, 27 Oct 2002 01:58:12 -0700

Frank,

I haven't gotten anything from you yet. If you're serious about the paper, you need to get serious about getting me the first $100. PayPal it to me at this email address.

John

Listen up, you devil worshiper. You gotta give me a little sample of your work before I give you a hundred bucks. You think I don't know a hustle when I hear one? I gots mad coin jigga and I knows the game. You ain't in control of this zoo! I is the one and only zookeeper. I got the keys and the tranquilizers up in this diggler. Now you be a good demon elf and write me some words. You can do it ASAP nick nack style. You gotta give up a piece o dat booty or you gets no b-zills. On the real. Mary Pop that paper with a spoon full of suga. This ain't no front.

Frank

After this little tirade, Mr. Rory stopped answering my emails. So I decided to email him pretending to be the Dean of Students at UCLA.

Date: Tue, 5 Nov 2002 13:11:06 -0800 (PST) From: "Dr. Fred Hewson" <xxxxphilo828@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: UCLA A&S Department To: "Rory" <xxxx@rory.com>

My name is Dr. Fred Hewson and I am Dean of Students of the Arts and Sciences Department here at the University of California at Los Angeles. I just received a list of email addresses from the Psychology Department that are allegedly those of professionals who are willing to write papers for students. I am not accusing you, nor am I insinuating, that you are in contact with a student. I only request that you give me any information that you can about this matter. We feel it necessary to investigate these rumors to see if anything of substance turns up. Again, I seek your help in this investigation so that the students who would engage in this kind of unethical practice could be punished accordingly. We in no way wish to bring any kind of charges against the above mentioned Professionals. This is an educational concern and not a legal one. If you could contact me with any information of relevance please do so at your convenience.

Sincerely,

Dr. Fred Hewson

From: "Rory" <xxxx@rory.com> To: "Dr. Fred Hewson" <xxxxphilo828@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: UCLA A&S Department Date: Tue 05, Nov 2002 15:12:14 -0800

Fred Hewson writes:
> My name is Dr. Fred Hewson and I am Dean of Students
> of the Arts and Sciences Department here at the
> University of California at Los Angeles.

Hey Fred, why don't you write from your UCLA email address?
Your use of a yahoo account hardly inspires confidence that this is any kind
of official investigation.

> I just
> received a list of email addresses from the Psychology
> Dept. that are allegedly those of professionals who
> are willing to write papers for students.

I am a computer engineer. I wonder why your psych department thinks
that I might be willing to write papers for their students? On the other hand, I am a reasonably good writer, have had a modest amount of work published, and do take freelance writing assignments from time to time.

> I am not
> accusing you, nor am I insinuating, that you are in
> contact with a student. I only request that you give
> me any information that you can about this matter.

Contact me with your bona fides and I'll let you know whether or not we
have something to talk about in this regard. I am available for software and
data acquisition consulting, so you might keep me in mind for that sort of
work. I am competent to write documentation for systems and to write final
reports and statements of work, as well as to co-author grant proposals (I have several dozen successful ones under my belt).

> We
> feel it necessary to investigate these rumors to see
> if anything of substance turns up.

I'm glad that you're investigating the honesty of your students. If you
have a list of emails of psych professionals who might write papers for
students, you probably have a list of students who communicated with them. I
suggest you check your system email logs.

> Again, I seek your
> help in this investigation so that the students who
> would engage in this kind of unethical practice could
> be punished accordingly.

See my paragraph above ... That's more free advice than I usually
dispense. Email me and we can make an appointment if you have any further needs. My retainer is not small, but I will accept a check from UCLA.

> We in no way wish to bring
> any kind of charges against the above mentioned
> professionals.

It doesn't matter what you wish for. Professionals of any type are
legally permitted to write material for hire. The ethics of plagiarism and
cheating are an academic, not a legal matter.

> This is an educational concern and not
> a legal one. If you could contact me with any
> information of relevance please do so at your
> convenience.
Sincerely, Dr. Fred Hewson

So "Fred," what's this game really about?

John Rory======================

Gray Davis is the "Education Governer"
sorta like Herbert Hoover was the Stock Market President!
Vote your hopes, not your fears:
Camejo/Warren - Green Party

Date: Wed, 6 Nov 2002 13:11:06 -0800 (PST) From: "Dr. Fred Hewson" <xxxxphilo828@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: UCLA A&S Department To: "Rory" <xxxx@rory.com>

Mr. Rory,

I thank you for your willingness to help us investigate this matter, but I'm afraid I haven't made myself clear. This isn't a game. This is a serious investigation of student plagiarism that should demand respect from any professional. We simply request that you give us the names of students from UCLA that have contacted you. We do have a list of names of students that have turned up that appear to be related to the list of writers for hire. It is my hope that, with your help, we can determine if these students were involved in this practice. The department's server is down and I'm using my personal email address for the time being. Don't you dare insticate me sir. I am not one to be trifled with. I'm a Korean War Veteran and a Republican. So, save your Green Party Hippie crap for someone without a job. Now give us the names of the students who have contacted you or you will be subject to investigation.

Sincerely,

Dr. Fred Hewson

From: "Rory" <xxxx@rory.com> To: "Dr. Fred Hewson" <xxxxphilo828@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: UCLA A&S Department Date: Wed, 06 Nov 2002 15:09:53 -0800

Hiya , "Fred"!

You don't exist. Quit lying to me. Cease the posing. Stop the harassment. I'll give you 24 hours to explain yourself and apologize before I take this up with Yahoo. If there's anything I detest more than Republicans, it's self-righteous Republicans (but then most seem to be).

Bright Blessings,

John

Date: Wed, 6 Nov 2002 17:01:10 -0800 (PST) From: "Dr. Fred Hewson" <xxxxphilo828@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: UCLA A&S Department To: "Rory" xxxx@rory.com

Okay, dude, don't get nutty here. It's me Frank. I was a little pissed off when you stopped answering my emails and I decided to play a little prank on you. Look, nothing is fucked here dude, everything is cool. I still need you to write me the paper. Dude, don't be a plant and write my paper for me ASAP. You just gotta take one night to write it. You have to put off eating live sheep for one night and chimney sweep a paper for my cute ass. You gotta do it Mary Poppins style. With a spoon full of suga son. Make this paper sweet and tasty like Mr. Belvedere's crepes.

Peace digga,

Frank

From: "John Rory" <xxxx@rory.com> To: "Fred Hewson" <xxxxphilo828@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: UCLA A&S Dept Date: Wed, 06 Nov 2002 17:30:01 -0800

>Okay dude don't get nutty here. It's me Frank.

No! Really? I never would have guessed in a million years. Find somebody else. If you have time for prank email, you have time to do the learning and write the paper. You continue to register higher and higher on my "flake" meter and I'm not interested in doing business with you.

Get your act together,

John

Date: Wed, 6 Nov 2002 19:13:03 -0800 (PST) From: "Dr. Fred Hewson" <xxxxphilo828@yahoo.com> Subject: Re: UCLA A&S Department To: "Rory" <xxxx@rory.com>

John, I told you not to be a plant. You be pollinating and what not. What do you want? What do you need? I gots b-zills, I gots poon poon, I gots crazy fresh gold, I gots twenty whips with all the fixins and twippy bitty flippy tips. Now, you can have access to all my accessories, all you gots to do is get on your lappy-top and cook me a steak with a side of five pages double spaced on the unconscious minds influence on ritual practices and the Pagan belief system. I talked to my buddy Goldie Lox and he said he wants you to take a test for him. It's a class called Parapsychology 101. It's the study of ghosts and shitz. Goldie has turned moneys into ghosts, but he ain't no ghostbusta. Word? So, would you be down for some test takin? We could fly you to L.A. in our private Herb Bird. Fly the smoky skies like a real Phatman B! We would pay your way and make sure you'd have a 2 Live Crew, Al Capone, Dustin Diamond, Pagans Gone Wild, true dat good time here in LA. If you is game, let me know.

Keep it rizzy on the shizzy!

Frank